Mistaken Identity: Episodes 1121-1194
Ah, Mistaken Identity: posts that demonstrate how my ego stays in check thanks to all the email I get meant for other people. In case you were wondering, my ego is VERY in check. SO MANY EMAILS.
Just highlights this time. A few gems below in full, but there have been MANY more, including:
- Hotel bookings in Chicago, Paris and Dubai.
- Her kid’s StudyMode and Lumosity accounts and her need for extra help with the band in Eau Claire, WI. (Is band tutoring a thing?) Also another Other Me’s tutoring (but if she can’t spell her own email address properly do you want her tutoring your children?), teaching in California, and volunteer music-teaching in Surrey. (Probably not intended for the same person, those last two emails.)
- The affairs of Den 1 Pack 735 of Richmond, VA.
- Emails about the Hyundai I10 she bought in Bristol. Also a National Speed Awareness Course. Did she get a ticket already?
- Lecturer Charlotte’s presentation and rubric for passing what looks like a very intense and complex (not kidding, it looks super difficult) makeup class.
- Pictures of Gary and Ben, slightly older gentlemen who are each looking for dates. In a pleasing change of pace, however, their pictures are all fully clothed. Perhaps Other Me is getting more tame.
- One metric crapton of messages regarding her apartment hunt. Pictures of them, responses to her inquiry, and information about automatic lofts. What is an automatic loft??
- A karate graduation in Bethlehem, PA. Is this the Other Me I nearly ran into at my grocery store?? But then also Charles’ invitation tto a fundraising dinner in Elizabeth, NJ. Is THIS the nearby Other Me? And then Lucy’s personal essay to edit, sent to her sister, Other Me, for advice, who interestingly also lives in New Jersey. Maybe THIS is her??
* * * * * * *
Notes from Allan, who capitalizes not his own name but instead every word of his emails like some kind of reverse e.e. cummings:
From: allen smith
Baby Also I Will Tell You That I Bought It And Then I Altered It Some
I Guess You Fell Alseep Baby I Hope You Have A Good Night And Sweet
Dreams Mmmwwaaa I Love You
Sorry Baby I Couldnt Make It Home Early Because My Aunt Had To Take
And Go Get My Cousins Glasses Fixed And So Yea
After the third one I decided to tell Allen he was talking to the wrong person. Bless his heart.
Oh Sorry Im Not Exactly Great With Emailing Because I Am Using A Flip
Phone To Email So I Apologize I Will Attempt To Email With Better Care
* * * * * *
Is Other Me a sub-par birthday diver? It would seem so.
Subject: Samantha birthday party
Only 5 days to go to Sam’s birthday party.
As I have been unable to contact you for the last month and a half, I will send this last e-mail to you.
Could you please confirm that you are going to come and dive with Sam and her friends. RSVP By tomorrow evening, please.
I will have to organize a different diver in case you do not respond to this email. I can not let my girl be so
* * * * * *
You have got observations again on Thursday morning.
Go to the staff room at 8.45 and introduce yourself to the teacher.
The observation will be from 9am – 10.30am
Take observation 3 in your observation folder to fill in.
Here are the teachers you are observing:
Ben observing Phil room 2 level B1
Sara observing Catherine room 3 level B1
Rebecca observing Akshana room 20 level B1
Hajera observing Emma room 6 level A2
Aisha observing Debra room 18 level B2
If any of you are down to observe the same person as you did last week please let me know. I think I’ve changed you all but I can’ t quite remember.
Hope this makes sense.
Please confirm that you have received this email.
Jane and Rob
* * * * * *
More from Jane. Why is Other Me woozy??
Subject: Lesson planning
I’ve just realised that you and I should have been planning this lunch time but I imagine you were still feeling woozy. Anyway I have found a lesson which is quite straightforward to plan so you should be able to look at it over the weekend. I have scanned the pages for you.
I suggest the following
Some engage question related to technology
If you look at the lexis on page 98 you might want to update it or make it harder or even pre-teach lexis from the reading
You can do the questions on page 98 or come up with a gist question of your own
On page 99 you have the reading and the questions they need to answer for detail reading.
If you look on page 100 there is a “language in chunks” section which has some nice phrases to teach
As an activate you could have them agreeing or disagreeing with the text
I hope this is of use to you and that you don’t overdo it this weekend. Let me know if you have any questions and I’ll try and answer them before I go off today.
* * * * * *
Update since this email: “Quinn will not be trainning for a while as he has torn a piece of bone off his ankle with his tendon we are all gutted xx”. If you’re curious what game they’re playing, it’s rugby.
From: Michael Martin
Great training on Sunday, thanks for the good turnout.
Two new people, welcome to Archer and James. I hope we made you feel welcome.
Well done to Josh Bullard for evading capture during the exercise.
Our first festival is Foxbury on the 4th October, so not too much time for training.
I am not around on Sunday, so I leave you in the capable hands of our great coaches.
Of note is a welcome to Gavin to help out with the coaching. Thanks for helping out. Special request also for Gavin. We need to see those sexy legs in shorts every Sunday please.
Thanks also to the Dads that helped out by holding the pads, it is greatly appreciated.
Training on Sunday at 10:15.If you have not yet registered, please do so.
Also please register on the IOW tour website if you have not yet done it.
* * * * * *
The next two presented without comment. Okay maybe a little comment.
Subject: SmartJailMail.com Invitation from STEVEN
Hello, [REDACTED], an inmate at [REDACTED], would like to exchange e-mail with you using SmartJailMail.com. SmartJailMail.com is a secure e-mail system used by inmates to connect with their friends and family. It is faster and less expensive than other ways to communicate with inmates, such as regular postal mail. If you would like to exchange e-mail with STEVEN, please use the link below to accept this invitation.
* * * * * *
From: JPay Services
Subject: An Offender has invited you to begin eMessaging
[REDACTED] [NO, THIS IS A DIFFERENT GUY] [SERIOUSLY OTHER ME COME ON] invites you to visit www.jpay.com so that you can send and receive electronic letters.
Click here to access JPay and set up an account for free.
From your JPay account you can send electronic letters to an offender in Indiana Department of Correction.
Once your e-letters are received, Jared will be able to reply to your e-letters and you can view them in your “Incoming Mail” section of your JPay account.
You can also send money to this offender with JPay.
This email has been sent to you on behalf of an offender incarcerated at the Indiana Department of Correction. If you no longer wish to recieve communications from this person please reply to this email.
JPay Mail Services