They’re On To Me: A Play in Two Acts
(Doctor, seeing my foot, half of which is an interesting shade of navy.)
DOCTOR: Ooh, wow.
(DOCTOR does that thing where he pokes EXACTLY WHERE IT HURTS and asks “Does that hurt?” and then leaves the room to get something.)
ME: So, I have a couple of questions….
(DOCTOR doesn’t even bother coming back to answer, but yells from the hallway.)
DOCTOR: No you can’t, and no you can’t!
(Receptionist, scheduling my next appointment.)
RECEPTIONIST: So, he wants to see you again on Saturday.
ME (grumpily): Well, I can’t go visit my friends, and I can’t go to tae kwon do, and I can’t go to jiu jitsu, and I can’t go running, so I’m free all day. Unless I decide to take up knitting or something.
RECEPTIONIST (cheerily): Oh, don’t do that, you’d probably hurt yourself.